How to Set Clear MFing Boundaries

LISTEN TO EP 11: ITUNES | SPOTIFY


Welcome back, loves! This episode, I’ll be chatting about how to set realistic boundaries, how to express our boundaries to people AND how to hold people accountable. Emotional and physical boundaries are what protect your core values. The problem is, most of us have never even thought of what our core values are until the boundaries around them have been damaged. And then we learn that either we’ve never clearly identified our core values OR our core values are trash. 


What Do Healthy Boundaries Look Like?

  • Saying “no” and accepting “no” from others. 

  • Not letting others define you, your self-worth, or how you love yourself.

  • Defining how and when people can touch.

  • Knowing that your needs and feelings are just as important as others.


What Do Unhealthy Boundaries Look Like?

  • Not being able say “no” and also not accepting when others say “no.”

  • Feeling like you are responsible for how other people feel. 

  • Touching people without their permission.

  • Feeling like you are responsible for “fixing” or “saving” people.


Find Your Core Values

  • Ask yourself “What is most important in my life?” And list them all out.

  • Ask yourself “Are there any values that are inconsistent with my identity?” and “Are they any values that reflect the influence of someone else?”

  • Acknowledge the fact that some people may not like your boundaries and that’s okay! (Check out episode 7 if you need some help coming to terms with this.)


5 Ways to Build Better Boundaries

  1. Give yourself permission to have boundaries.

  2. Let go of what people might think of you and your decisions.

  3. Stay firm, be less apologetic, and honor your boundaries.

  4. Practice self-awareness.It’s the only way to hold yourself and others to the boundaries.

  5. Start small. Setting boundaries takes courage and practice.



Hope you loved this episode. If you did, please do me a favor and submit a review on iTunes, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Also be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you can be the first to get new episodes. And I’d like to encourage you to share this episode on IG stories, Twitter, Facebook. Make sure you tag me, I am @tyalexander on IG and @lovetyalexander on Twitter. Just share it, girl!



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